The Three Decisions That Shape Everything—And How to Get Them Righ

Let’s cut right to it. It’s all too easy to waste time dwelling on the small stuff—what apps to use, which outfits to buy, whether to pick up a new hobby next month. But underneath all those surface-level choices, there are three major life decisions that, if you nail, can set your entire future on a more fulfilling, meaningful, and truly exciting track. These decisions are so fundamental, yet so often overlooked, that getting just one of them wrong can quietly throw off every other area of your life.

We’re talking about:

1. Who You’re With

2. What You’re Doing

3. Where You Live

The best part? Once you understand the power of these three pillars, you can stop drowning in a million trivial decisions and focus on what actually moves the needle for your happiness, success, and peace of mind.

1. Who You’re With

Think about the times you’ve felt your absolute best—clear-headed, inspired, genuinely motivated. Odds are, you were in the company of people who believed in you, challenged you in a constructive way, and aligned with your values. On the flip side, recall those long, draining periods where you felt stuck, anxious, or underappreciated. The common denominator might have been someone—maybe multiple people—who undermined you or clashed with your vision of who you want to become.

Why It’s Crucial:The people closest to you define your standards, your mindset, and your sense of normal. When you’re constantly around folks who prioritize growth, integrity, and curiosity, you gradually absorb their drive and habits. But if you’re stuck with individuals who thrive on negativity, gossip, or complacency, that environment seeps into your subconscious, no matter how strong your willpower is.

What Happens If You Miss:Spend too long around people who deplete your energy or ignore your boundaries, and you’ll find yourself stuck in a loop of negativity, lacking the forward momentum you need to hit your true potential. Life starts to feel like you’re swimming through molasses—everything takes more effort because the support system isn’t there.

How to Get It Right:Prioritize relationships that are grounded in mutual respect, shared values, and genuine encouragement. That doesn’t mean you need a circle of clones who think exactly like you, but it does mean seeking out those who complement your strengths, inspire your ambition, and offer honest feedback when you need it. Find people with whom you can exchange meaningful ideas, celebrate wins, and process losses without judgement. Your future self will thank you for every ounce of effort you invest in curating a powerful, uplifting network.

2. What You’re Doing

Now let’s talk about work—the projects, businesses, or crafts that occupy a big chunk of your waking hours. It’s easy to treat your job as just a paycheck or a necessary routine, but when you do that, you miss out on one of the most potent avenues for personal growth. Think of all the mental space your work occupies. If it drains you, that negative energy bleeds over into your relationships, your health, and your outlook on life.

Why It’s Crucial:Work shapes your daily reality. The conversations you have, the skills you refine, and the problems you solve can all serve as building blocks toward a life that’s both lucrative and purpose-driven. Naval Ravikant often talks about seeking the kind of work that “feels like play to you but looks like work to others.” That’s not just a whimsical wish; it’s a practical way to ensure that your career is sustainable in the long term because you actually enjoy it.

What Happens If You Miss:Trudge along in a job that saps your energy day after day, and you’ll watch your creativity, motivation, and confidence slowly erode. You come home at the end of the day feeling drained, struggling to muster enthusiasm for anything beyond mindless distractions. Worse yet, you may passively carry the stress over into your personal life and relationships.

How to Get It Right:Seek out the pursuits that energize you. If you don’t know what those are yet, experiment until you find your sweet spot, then double down. Sometimes that means stepping outside your comfort zone—taking on a side project that scares you a bit or switching to a new field that has always intrigued you. Be relentless in trying new ideas, but also practical: manage your finances, leverage existing skills, and build a runway that allows you to explore without jeopardizing your basic needs.

3. Where You Live

Finally, there’s the question of location—an often underrated factor in shaping your outlook, daily habits, and personal freedoms. It’s not just about the glamour of living in a big city or the tranquility of the countryside. It’s about choosing a place that aligns with your goals, whether that means building a startup, pursuing a certain lifestyle, or finding peace to do the creative work you love.

Why It’s Crucial:Where you live impacts your cost of living, professional network, cultural fit, and overall mental well-being. Certain cities become hubs for specific industries—tech, finance, art, or entertainment—while others offer a slower pace and a chance for introspection and lower expenses.

What Happens If You Miss:Plant yourself in an environment that stifles your growth or strains your finances, and you’ll feel the effects daily. It’s that nagging sense of friction every time you pay rent, commute through chaos, or struggle to find like-minded people. Over time, these frustrations stack up, draining your spirit and limiting your opportunities.

How to Get It Right:Ask yourself what you truly value in terms of environment and community. Is it access to a thriving entrepreneurial scene, a vibrant cultural sphere, or the comfort of a supportive local network? Maybe a beautiful natural setting is non-negotiable for you. Recognize that we live in a more connected world than ever—remote work, online communities, and flexible living options abound. You might not have to choose between professional success and peaceful surroundings. Consider short-term stints or “test runs” in new places if you’re unsure. Once you find a spot that aligns with your aspirations, watch how your motivation and creativity flourish.

Putting It All Together

These aren’t just little “life choices”—they’re the foundation of your entire experience. When you get who you’re with, what you’re doing, and where you live aligned with your values and goals, a world of possibility opens up. You’re not swimming against the current anymore. Instead, you’re surfing the wave of your own momentum, propelled by a powerful support system, meaningful work, and an environment that helps you thrive.

Conversely, if any of these three pillars falters—if you’re surrounded by toxic relationships, stuck in soul-sucking work, or living in a place that doesn’t support your dreams—it’s like dragging an anchor behind you. Sure, you can still move forward, but it’ll be an uphill battle every step of the way.

So the time is now. Take an honest look at each of these areas in your life. Are there people you need to distance yourself from, or communities you need to tap into? Is it time to pivot in your career, start a side project, or double down on that elusive passion? Could relocating—whether to a new neighborhood or an entirely different country—unlock new opportunities or inspire you in a way you haven’t felt in years?

You don’t need all the answers this second, but clarity comes through action. Start making one small change in the direction that excites you. Then see how momentum builds as these three decisions come into alignment. You deserve a life that feels like it’s fully yours—because, ultimately, it is.

Blessings,

Samuel Axel